Forgiveness Helps Us Find Joy
“Hatred stirs up strife, But love covers all sins.” Proverbs 10:12(NKJV)
Have you ever been around someone who seems to be overcome by bitterness, anger, and even vengeful? These individuals have one main obsession in common – an unforgiving heart. At one time or another, the individual has felt they have been wronged. Unfortunately we all become ill-treated by someone on occasion; sometimes even by someone we love. Where it becomes an issue of sin is when we find ourselves holding onto grudges wanting to take revenge on those who have wronged us. The sin the other person had done to us becomes deep rooted sin within our own heart because we failed to give the transgression the person had committed toward us to the Lord. We failed to forgive the offender.
I know all too well how one can become so miserable because I too had an unforgiving heart at one time. I grew up in an abusive home. I found it extremely difficult to forgive my father. At the same time I was raised around bitter women who held grudges over those who had wronged them. In my late teens I realized I did not want to become a bitter woman like them, so I knew I would need to make some changes within my own heart. After all, I knew how difficult it was being around these bitter women and I did not want to repeat their mistakes and be miserable most of my life as well as make those around me miserable. “Love prospers when a fault is forgiven, but dwelling on it separates close friends.” Proverbs 17:9 (NLT)
My husband, Jim, helped me understand the real meaning of forgiveness. He showed me through God’s Word that forgiveness was the only way to true happiness, peace, loving kindness, and joy. If a perfect God could forgive a sinner like me, as well as all the sinners of this world, then how can I, a sinner, not forgive another sinner? “But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too.” Mark 11:25 (NLT). Jim explained that forgiving my father was not saying that what he did was right, or never happened, but rather, it is saying, ‘I forgive you who cause the transgression, and relinquish you and the hurt and pain you have caused me to our heavenly Father.’ Said a different way, “When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” Catherine Ponder. “To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.” Lewis B. Smedes.
At first I did not understand how I could forgive my father when he never asked for forgiveness in the first place. But forgiving my father was more for me, my happiness and my relationship with the Lord than for my dad’s sake. I had to realize that it was not up to me to punish my dad, or even seek revenge. The Bible says, “Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the LORD” Romans 12:19 (NLT).
If there is an offense that someone has done that is truly illegal such as a murderer, rapist, abuser, etc. then they should be punished by the law for their crime. Forgiving the offender is more about having a clear conscience and a pure heart. “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:31, 32 (NKJV).
All the above mentioned is also true when we are the offender and we find it difficult to forgive ourselves. “Oh, what joy for those whose disobedience is forgiven, whose sins are put out of sight.” Romans 4:7 (NLT). We need to learn from our own mistakes and move on and stop punishing ourselves. I have to confess that this is an area I need to practice. I find it more difficult to forgive myself for my failures and offenses than it is to forgive those who have offended me.
Whether we need to forgive ourselves or someone else, in so doing, all bitterness will be gone and the joy of our salvation returns to us. “Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.” Psalm 51:12 (NIV).
My pray for you today is; “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13 (NIV). Amen.
Devotion is tip #7 in 12 Steps To Finding and Staying Joyful
Such wisdom in this post. It’s ironic that something that is so difficult to do leads us to such freedom. I guess all things worthwhile take work.
Andie
Wonderful post Michele 🙂
Forgiving others (and yourself) will allow you to have happiness, peace, loving kindness, and joy in your life.
Krista
Powerful message, Michele. At times I have a hard time to forgive, but if I give it the God it helps me to move on. You are right, we are all sinners and should extend His grace and not withhold it.