Five Things to Observe With Care.
Willian Norris, the American journalist who specialized in simple rhythms that packed a wallop once wrote: If your lips would keep from slips, Five things observe with care: To whom you speak; of whom you speak; And how, and when, and where.
I believe the tongue is the most powerful tool the Lord has given man. The tongue can lead a person to great achievements or great destruction.
In the move, A Christmas Story two boys surrounded by their classmates argue whether a persons tongue will stick to a metal pole in below-freezing weather.
Eventually one of the boys succumbs to the “triple-dog dare.†He sticks his tongue out and touches it to the flagpole.
Sure enough, it gets stuck. The recess bell rings. Everyone runs into the school building, everyone except the hapless victim. When the teacher finally looks out the window, she sees the boy writhing in pain, his tongue frozen to the flagpole.
Now I sure hope you know better than to stick your tongue to the flagpole, but many of us know what it’s like to have you tongue get you in trouble. I know I have.
Proberbs 17: 27 says “A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of understanding is even-tempered.”
When I first was married I complained about my husband. I complained what he was or was not doing, I complained to anyone who would listen to me. I was knocking him down left and right. The Lord gave me a friend who spoke nothing but good things about her husband. In fact for a year or so, I would think “is this girl for real”? She has never said one negative word about her husband. It made me think of the phrase “gag me with a spoon” (boy am I dating myself).
Through that friend and through church lessons on how we need to “uplift our husbands” I decided to make a conscience effort to only say good things to him, to other people, but more importantly in front of other people. Was the change instant? No it took several years; we altered how we spoke to each other and what our initial reaction to each other was. I believe in this case as I gained more “knowledge” of God’s word and how to live a Godly life, my words became more “restraint”. And I can tell the big difference in our marriage and our happiness.
Today the thing I struggle with is sarcasm. I am sarcastic when I am angry, when I am driving, ok almost any situation. Sarcasm is defined by Webster as “a sharply ironical taunt; sneering or cutting remark.†Sarcasm makes the other person feel inferior. Sometimes the sarcasm is funny, sometimes it is hurtful. I am not sarcastic to other people, just my family.
Proverbs 21:23 He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.
The calamity that results is a house in turmoil; people not getting along or just plain grumpy moods. Instead, my job is to uplift and encourage.
With friends, and family how are you going to use your tongue today?
Heavenly Father may only what is good, holy, and pure come from my mouth. For what comes from my mouth is an indication of my heart. Help me to bless and uplift others today. Amen
I always want to be an encourager, not a discourager. Thanks for a great post Laurel.
Great post today Laurel. I had a situation recently where I had to guard my tongue even though I didn’t want too! Thanks for the reminder of God’s word and what it says about our tongue. I’m really glad I obeyed 🙂
I have to say I am guilty of that with my coworkers and the mood is not always so positive. Hm. Time to keep an eye on that, eh?
Thanks, Laurel!
Laurel,
Excellent post. I am glad you brought up sarcasm. I hear it even around the church. Someone once told me that sarcasam is cowardace. It is a way to say something mean indirectly. Hmmmmm
Proverbs 12:18 Reckless words pierce like a sword,
but the tongue of the wise brings healing.
You and I choose to be women who speak words of healing. Amen.
I love how you talked about respecting our husbands in front of people. I know so many women who absolutely DOG their hubbies and what they don’t realize is that stuff sticks in our minds! We may forgive our husband some offense but others do not forget. I especially have to be careful about this because of having a husband in ministry. He is God’s man and I have a holy fear of speaking against him in a way that would dishonor Him or his credibility with the flock.
And the sarcasm thing?? Ouch! Me and the boys have issues here. I had a day a couple weeks ago that I determined if a remark I was going to say was sarcastic, I wouldn’t say it. I hardly spoke a word all day.. haha…Thanks for this reminder..this is an area I’m working on. But a question Laurel..Do you think it is with our boys because they are boys? I don’t talk to my daughter that way??? Something to chew on..:))
Have a great Weekend!!
It took some hard lessons before I finally learned that I’m usually a lot better off just keeping my mouth shut when anything upsetting or controversial is going on around me. I’ve finally reached a place in my life where it’s easier to be an encourager.
Now that my children are grown, I’ve accepted that if they want or need my opinion, they’ll probably ask for it. And sarcasm is something I have to be very, very careful with. Amazing how much damage it can do.
As alway, Laurel, this post is really well-written and gives us something to think about.
Excellent post, Laurel. Praise God for a friend who taught you by example.
Words can tear down or build up. When my husband and I pray together at night, I always ask the Lord to give us encouraging words for one another AND for our children. It’s sooo important.
Thanks for the great reminder!
This onehits me right where I live Laurel. I have had to fight this battle all my life. I hope I getting a bit better. I have been where you were and agree with all you’ve said. I’m thankful always that the Lord is patient. He works on us a bit at a time and never gives up on us. I find myself literaly biting my tongue sometimes. The pain I feel is a lot less than the pain I can so easily inflict with my sharp words.
Thanks for a great post.
Laurel this post is so timely because of this week….I am so angry right now with a certain person and just want to lash out and usually if I do that it’s through sarcasm….I have really been asking God this week to seal my lips so that I won’t say something I regret and more importantly hurt someone in the process. I am still hurting badly but God is the one who control things ultimately so I need to trust Him for the outcome no matter what….
Thanks for sharing
Blessings
What a great post Laurel! I too struggled with dogging my husband early in our marriage. God showed me several years ago what a wonderful husband I have, and for that I am eternally grateful! Now as for the sarcasm, Oh dear! From your mouth to my ears, Sister. From your mouth to my ears!!!
Funny–I was just talking about this elsewhere. Hmmm. I notice it a lot of places right now–think God is trying to tell me something?
Ah, yes, sarcasm…I have been on the receiving end of it–sometimes it is funny, sometimes really hurtful. The tongue indeed is a powerful tool…I pray that the Lord uses my tongue to up-lift and never hurt…
Thank you for sharing from you heart, my friend.
It is really a big lesson for me to control my tongue,knowing what to say, how to say,when to say.
Before when I was in difficulties, I would meet a sister and complained, then I felt a little better.
But now we learn to never speak the words which not please the Lord.
Yesterday that sister called me and told me about her hurt by one. I comfort her and encourage her, I told her that the Lord knows everything about her, HE loves her forever.
May the Lord give us wisdom to be salt in the word.