Potty Training and Pride….
Pride over the potty? Yeah, it’s possible. But let me explain.
I have been a Mom for a long time, now. Nearly 17 years. There are certain things that I have “down pat” by now. Or should have, right? You know, the Mommy basics. Important things such as: Table manners, teaching the “abc’s” and potty training. Right?
How about 2 out of three? Does that count? Let’s just say Potty Training hasn’t been my strong suit this time around. This third child of mine? He is independant, brilliant and loved by all, and just doesn’t seem to “get” potty training. He doesn’t want to.
Today, it’s freaking me out. Actually, I’m embarassed. He’s healthy, and he CAN do it. He just, well, doesn’t.
The potty training, isn’t really the problem. The problem is me. See, I have opportunites to do a bit of public speaking, usually on mothering topics mostly general things, like discipline or grief. In addition to my years as a Mom, I taught preschool for a number of years and then, for nearly 13 years, I coordinated a childrens counseling ministry. I have written and taught parenting seminars, classes and workshops.
On Wednesday, of this week? I’ve been asked to speak, on potty training.
Yep, me, the potty training failure. Speaking on potty training. Ouch. I think I’d rather speak on just about anything else at the moment. Something I’m good at, would be nice. (How about knitting? Or talking to your teens about politics? Or even talking to your kids about sex? How about that? At least I’ve accomplished most of those!)
Nope. The speaker doesn’t always get to pick the topic. Potty Training it is.
I’ve read books, bought videos, bought fancy underwear, offered bribes and made threats. Today, I headed back out to the bookstore (when I don’t have answers- I look them up;) just in case there had been some new “advances” in the field of potty training. (There haven’t been, but I bought another book, anyway) When I got home, I went on line and actually ordered a “Toddler Urinal” (Mr Big boy likes to use the urinal) I figured- it’s only $39.00 so what’s the harm? Target.com, btw)
Then, tonight? I read this:
Psalm 10:4
in all his thoughts there is no room for God.
Have I even sought God on this whole thing? Ummmm, NO. My thoughts have been so full of my own solutions, my own embarrassment, my own reasoning and searching, that there has been no room for God, in the Potty Training equation.
A symptom of pride? Yes. It is.
Pride? Yes, I really WANT to be known as a great mom. I take pride in my kids accomplishing their “milestones”. I hope and help them to accomplish them early, whenever possible. Why? Oh— yes- so they can be healthy and make the most of their lives… but also? So people think i’m a great mom. That’s the not so good, kind of Mom pride. The kind that rears it’s head in embarrassment when my sweet child refuses to use the toilet, and i have to speak on potty training.
Pride is sneaky. It looks different in different situations. Sometimes it’s out there in an “I’m all that, and the rest of you aren’t”. kind of way. Sports type of pride. That’s easy to spot. Usually? Pride is much sneakier. . It could be “If they just did it MY way then we wouldn’t have these problems” (Often this one’s at work or church) or “Don’t they know______ is the right way to do that?” or, “I don’t need help- I can do this on my own” …. thoughts. Most of the time pride is in our thoughts.
Pride. Sometimes we see the effects- like embarrasment, frustration and anger. Sometimes we see it clear and on the surface. (Go Tigers!!!! We’re in the World Series! YES, WE RULE!… oops any one want to guess where I live?)
The truth is- we all have it. To varying degress, and with different symptoms and circumstances. When pride gets out of hand and is misplaced…. our thoughts turn to ourselves, crowding out thoughts of God.
So- this week I’ll be humbly speaking on potty training, fully aware that I don’t have all the answers, and fully aware that I need to pray more. My embarrassment and feelings of failure were a symptom of pride.
You may not be currently potty training, but maybe there are sports teams, or kids activities, or report cards, maybe you don’t even have kids- but there is a work related issues that smack of a bit of pride.. or a relationship, or _________.( you’ll have to fill in the blanks)
Are you seeing any symptoms? What are your thoughts crowded with? Today- before you finish your coffee.. I encourage you to let God into your thoughts, let Him show you where your pride is hiden, and let Him change your heart to one that’s humble.
It’s what I’m doing now…..
Dear Lord- love you, and I thank you for my boys, God- as I read this verse today- I could feel that you were talking to me about my pride. God- I know it hurts my kids and relationships when I get tied up in pride. I know that I hurt myself, when my thoughts crowd thoughts of you, out of my heart, I ask you to help me- and to forgive me for my pride.
I ask you to shed light on every heart that stops by- and help us each to give you reign in our hearts. You are gentle and loving, God- and you alone have all the answers- I love you, Jesus. And thank you, Oh… and Lord— since we’re talking about this now… could you help my little guy to use the potty? And God- please help me as I prepare this talk for Wednesday. Help it to encourage and equip other moms, Amen.
Oh my – pride. That is one of my biggest stumbling blocks. He always reminds me when I am blowing it again…
Thank you for sharing, Tracey. Blessings on your day.
Oh wow! This post spoke right to my sense of pride :)….Early this year I realized that I had let my pride in my accomplishments overshadow God’s true purpose for my life. It was a difficult thing to admit…however, once I admitted it I was able to move away from it. This led me into an area which is so out of my comfort zone…but it is also where I have been continually blessed. What remarkable and honest insight into our biggest stumbling blocks. Thanks.
I’m so there with you! I’m in the midst of potty training #2 & #3, and #1 just did it so perfect, it’s hard not to “require” the same; instead my son uses the potty as a beda (sp?)
Thanks for the hilarious, yet serious look at pride.
I thank God for leading me to come visit your blog today. It really hit home with me on issues that have nothing to do with potty training. I do feel some sympathy for you though, as I’m a mom of four boys myself. Mine are 12, nearly 10, 3 and 1. My three year old simply refuses to show any interest in potty training. He will go sit on the potty a few times every week, but will do nothing while on it. My hope is that one day he will just use the potty and that will be that. At any rate, I just wanted to leave you a comment, and thank you for honoring the message God gave you by sharing it with others. Ta for now dahling!
What a great post on pride. I have a lot of issues that I take a lot of pride in and if it doesnt go my way…oh man!
Like tonight for instance, I would just rather do it myself and get into an arguement over this thing than let someone else do it. For fear it wont be done right. UGH, I just need to let go of that.
I read your prayer than shut my eyes and said my own. Thanks!
Pride… I needed to read this today and what an excellent illustration… POTTY TRAINING!!! My potty training years are over but unfortunately pride still rears its ugly head, wedging in every chance it gets. God is the answer. Thanks for a great post!
Blessings,
Nancy
I’ve had big problems with pride and I’m still working on it! Your message really helped open my eyes to just how pride can ruin a moment or even a whole day. Thank you! *HUGS*
Pride. it’s tough, sometimes i’s so sneaky. Thnx for all the kind words- and praying for everyone.
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