The Deepest Worship
(yes, my reflection is in this picture)
I just spent the weekend away with 150 ladies from my church. A women’s retreat after Christmas, what a way to kick off the New Year!
Linda Dillow was our speaker. She did an amazing job talking about worshipping God daily. I loved her heart and felt her messages deeply but I couldn’t cry. What happened to me? Did God heal me of all my pain? Strange, I carry my tears around like I do my purse.
As I soaked up the wisdom Linda brought from the Word, I felt myself entering deeper worship. By Sunday morning, I was exhausted and catching a cold, but I made myself get up early to watch the sun rise. Spectacular. I felt like God’s hands were touching my face as the warmth of the morning sun beamed through the window. Captured by scene before me, I felt loved.
After breakfast and performing in the last of four skits, I took a seat in the front row. I let down. Just one more session, then I can go home.
Linda told the story of Abraham and Isaac, but this time I heard it in a fresh way. The way Linda told their father/son journey made me think of my own children. I wanted desperately to stay calm and leave on an up note, but instead my tears poured out one after another. I held back the sounds of sorrow I felt bubbling inside. Others didn’t. Their weeping broke my heart. So much pain in the room. Life is hard, isn’t it?
She shared a definition of an Isaac idol.
- something we love deeply
- something we want deeply
She added that when we bow our will to God, we are saying not my will, but yours. Not my timetable, but yours. Then she asked us to prayerfully consider the deepest form of worship by offering our Isaacs to God as an act of worship. By this point, I was undone. My list of Isaac’s had names and faces. They were personal. I wanted to run out of the room, but I sensed God was healing and comforting us, His precious girls. So I let myself be in His presence. I wept on my knees.
God, will You ever answer my prayers for healing those I love? Will You ever grant the deepest desires of my heart?
What if God never does? Will I still worship Him because He is God, my Holy and loving Father?
…Yes, Lord, I surrender. I praise you anyway. I love you. I worship You even when life is hard. You are my deliverer. My hope. I trust You know best even when it hurts.
I wrote down my Isaacs one by one and then stood proceeded to the altar to lay them down. I felt like I was walking on holy ground. After 20 minutes of intimate worship, the scene changed among us. One by one, we experienced God’s healing love. The sounds of wailing became beautiful praise. Arms raised, hearts surrendered. Songs from our hearts poured out. Beauty filled the air.
God came near.
I don’t know where you are today. I don’t know what your Isaacs are. But I do know God loves you more than you could ever imagine. He wants to comfort you and transform your tears to triumphant songs of praises. Will you surrender your Isaacs to Him today and experience Him deeper today? My prayer is that you will.
Those who sow in tears
will reap with songs of joy.
He who goes out weeping,
carrying seed to sow,
will return with songs of joy,
carrying sheaves with him. Psalm 126:5-6 (NIV)
God bless your day,
Tiffany (Tea with Tiffany)
http://www.teawithtiffany.blogspot.com
(sorry for the delay in posting and for the length. I tried to make it short.)
Tiffany,
It sounds like an awesome weekend, touched by God’s hand. I love Linda Dillow’s writing…I can relate to the moment of release and healing that comes when we lay down those things we hold so closely to our hearts. For me, it seems like, again and again, I’m asked to let go of my need for approval and acceptance, because it becomes an idol in my life.
Thanks for a great devotion today, Tiffany!
Thank you so much for sharing your heart and this wonderful lesson with us. Sounds like you had a great retreat! Happy Thankful Thursday!
That sounds like an awesome retreat and WOW what you came away with. Thanks for sharing with us and challenging us to lay our Isaacs at Gods feet. -Blessings, Laurie
Tiffany,
What an inspiring devotion! We often need to be reminded about giving God our Isaacs. Thanks for the encouragement
Linda
Thank you so much for sharing this. It is so difficult to lay those things that are nearest and dearest to us down before Him at times but oh the healing that comes when we do.
Oh Tiffany,
This was just incredible, maybe the best devotional ever! God’s anointing is all over this.
Thanks for sharing a glimpse of what you experienced this past weekend.
I just knew God was waiting to met you there.
… “He wants to comfort you and transform your tears to triumphant songs of praises.”
Thank God for the joy that comes in the morning!
Love you!!
Bless your beautiful heart my friend, love you.
Tiff, I loved this…. It reminded me of a time in 2001 when I was at a women’s retreat. Papa God touched me deeply that day in a way I had not experienced before. I did the “ugly” cry… I couldn’t stop. It was a time of letting go in order to move forward in healing. It was the beginning of a new road for me, one I had never walked on before…..
As I read what you’ve written I remember my own experience.
Love & Hugs,
Julie
How I share your heart on this Tiffany. It is so beautifully written. I had to come to that moment too. I still pray for healing for my precious loved ones (ones I would easily give my life for) but I have had to come to the point of surrendering them to the sovereign will of a loving Father. I confess, that I sometimes have to do it over and over. but whenever I truly do I feel such peace.
Thank you for sharing this. It was wonderful.
Tiffany, Thank you for writing such a powerful testimony. I’m so humbled that that Adonai, the God of compassion, comes near to us to comfort and heal us. One song that ministers to me is “In His Time.”
In His time, in His time,
He makes all thing beautiful in His time.
Lord, my life to You I bring,
May each song I have to sing,
Be to You a lovely thing, in Your time.
In Your time, in Your time,
You make all thing beautiful in Your time.
Lord, my life to You I bring,
May each song I have to sing,
Be to You a lovely thing, in Your time.
“He hath made every thing beautiful in his time:”Ecclesiastes 3:11
“What if God never does? Will I still worship Him because He is God, my Holy and loving Father?”
…that’s where I am. And slowly, my heart surrenders to worship purely because He is the great I AM.
Thank you for putting into words what my heart has felt for so many months.
Tiffany, this is absolutely beautiful. Thank you for the details and not cutting it too short! I too have been in search of true worship, not just going to worship, but being with God and communing with Him moment by moment. Have you read Carol Kent’s “When I Lay My Issac Down”? It’s amazing! Thank you for your reflections.
I came undone myself as I read this! Powerful! I have often found myself over the years in moments where I lay all of those personal pains before the LORD — crying out and always always as I wait on the Lord I pray to wait patiently for those I cry out to Him for. I could not imagine NOT worshipping Him. I could not imagine not sitting at His feet soaking in His love, His divine presence and then offering myself, my heart, my will, my emotions, my thoughts, everything even though it just doesn’t seem like enough — it doesn’t seem like what I offer is what He deserves for He deserves SO MUCH more YET as I offer my whole self He fills me with His love and comfort.
This reminded me of the song, Just say the Name of Jesus…when I don’t know what else to pray and when I can’t find the words to say — just say the Name — JESUS!
Praise the Lord!
Great posting as always Tiffany! Thanks for your vulnerability and for sharing your heart. Your openness encourages the same in the rest of us. I too have many \”Isaacs.\” You are an inspiration!
Thank you for sharing. It sounds so upliftining, life changing, and an incredible time. That is a great idea to put your “Isaacs” on the altar.
This was beautiful, Tiffany!! It is amazing how many things we can put before God. We need to be like Job and be willing to love God even if salvation is the only thing we ever receive from him. The amazing thing is that He is the God of the overflow! Love Him!
Sonya
Your words your beautiful and spoke to my heart. I want nothing before God. Must of my life was filled with idols,idols that I thought I could never live without.
But God never gave up on me and today He fills every part of my soul!
In His Grace,
Tammy
Beautiful thoughts Tiffany! I love the way you worded this, we all have Isaacs in our lives…
Thanks Tiffany, for sharing your retreat with us! I love ladies retreats, it seems God’s presence is so present when bunches of us are together! I also love the picture of your Hannah in the car and the picture you painted of our relating with our heavenly Father!
Beautiful!
Tiffany
This is a great post, and I am so jealous you got to hear Linda Dillow! It sounds like it was a wonderful retreat!
You have made me think about the Issacs in my life, and whether I would still love, praise, and worship my God is He does not do in their lives the things I so desperately pray for… and I would, I have already had to somewhat make that choice this past year, and it has been so very hard, to lay that Issac down, but the strength I have gained from the Lord, the intimacy in my walk with Him that I would not have obtained any other way, and the joy He has given me in the midst of some heart-wrenching times has just amazed me, He is so worth all of it!
Thanks for sharing, you are a huge blessing!
Blessings!
Hi Tiffany,
Your words and experience are powerful. I realized as I read through your post that I have an Issac I am grieving. I think God is asking me to give it up. YOur post touched me. Thank you.
Hi Tiff,
Well, almost a week late, but I’m finally getting to read your post – and WOW – this is so powerful.
I remember a time a few years back when I went through this same thing. Once in a while, the temptation to reclaim my Isaac Idol raises it’s head, but praise God, the times are less and less frequent.