The Fall
“because those who are led by The spirit of God are sons of God.” Romans 8:14 (NIV)
I lay at the foot of the stairs- at the feet of men and women. A multitude of thoughts warring with my mind. Get up; stay down; this is so embarrassing; I don’t care; stupid, stupid, stupid, why didn’t I listen?
Let me rewind for a moment. It was a beautiful spring Sunday and I was on a mission. My ladies’ group was having a bake sale missions’ fundraiser in the courtyard immediately following the morning service. Because we live in Florida, we do not dare, even in winter, to leave baked goods outside long, lest they become twice-baked. So the battle against the clock began at the altar service. Scurrying, we were grabbing two handfuls of dessert, dashing up and down the stairs, placing them on tables, and returning for another load. The first worshipers were beginning to spill out of the sanctuary, when I decided to do one last run to make sure we had not overlooked anything. My foot was on the second step when it came to me, “Take off your high-heals.” I quickly dismissed it, saying that I would do so when I was back at the bake sale. A quick once-over confirmed that we had all the tasty treats laid out and ready for our customers. Wanting to ensure the signs were up and the money bag in the right hands, I hurried back to the stairs. About a third of the way down, my heal shifted on the steps, and I began to fall. I did not exactly fall in a rolling fashion, as you might expect. Instead, my legs came down hard on the edge of the step; then I fell again, before picking up enough momentum to roll to the ground. Immediately, I was surrounded by a thoughtful group of men and women wanting to help me up. I wanted to get up fast, in case there were at least a few stragglers in the church who would not see me laid out like Sunday’s dinner. But, no. I could not get up. I feared I had broken my leg. Eventually, they scraped me up, my husband treated my boo-boo and we raised a decent amount of money for missions. Me, while seated. Seated and rehearsing the scenario in my mind. “Stupid, stupid, stupid, why didn’t you listen?!” You see, that voice on the way up, sounded a whole lot like mine. So I disregarded it. But in truth, it was wisdom from the Spirit of God. A thought. A nudge. An inner knowing. In truth, a warning. How many times does He try to spare me, but I am not teachable? Not directable?
It has been a year and a half since that fateful Sunday. The mission money long spent. The event forgotten. But still, I carry an obvious knot on my shin bone. To this day, if something touches it, I could howl with pain. It serves as a reminder to me. A reminder I live with day after day. Much like Jacob, who after he had wrestled with the Lord, was left with a gimpy hip. It changed the way he walked, the way he thought. It changed his life. As this did mine.
I have had many trips up and down that same flight of stairs. Unremarkable each time. But now, every flight of steps are viewed with the question- should I take off my shoes? The hand rail is no longer ignored. In fact, if there is a crowd on the steps, I will pause until I can put my hand on the rail. Painful lesson learned!
Since that day, I try to listen out for the gentle direction of God. Is He leading me to hug that lady? Should I not buy these shoes? Should I increase my offering amount? I try to make these decisions in light of my inner GPS. The working of the Holy Spirit, who, should I listen to Him, will keep me on the right path for my life. He will help me avoid many pitfalls and crashes. The Holy Spirit, our companion, is so much more than just the agent to make us more like Christ- though that mission would be enough! He comes alongside us. He provides comfort, teaching, counseling, and direction. He gives us profound wisdom that is beyond our understanding. But do you know what else? He helps us with the little, day-to-day, mundane things. He inspires me on how to best treat a stain in the laundry. He reminds me to put sunscreen on the kids. He is altogether Holy. But He is completely practical. All of life is enhanced by the leadership of the Spirit of God. As a born-again child of God, we have access to all of His wisdom and direction. How foolish are we to ignore Him and continue on our own way? Headlong down a steep flight of stairs…
Dear Lord, help me to seek you in both the little and the great details of life. Forgive me for going my own way, drowning out your voice, and making my own decisions. I want to be a daughter of God, who is indeed led by your Spirit. In every aspect of my life. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.
Thanks, Sheri, I needed this reminder/conformation today.
Thank you, Linda, for the encouraging words! He is so faithful- if I would just get out of the way!
Love you!
Sherri
Amen to that! I often just go my own way and ‘crash’. I need to be more mindful of God’s leading through the Holy Spirit.
Iris,
The Saturday night after this post, I revisited the stairs. This time falling UP them after my son’s wedding. The unction was there again- pick up the hem of your long dress; hold the rails; but my hands were full and I was exhausted. I discovered that falling UP is really no better than falling DOWN. Listening… that feels good!