God Knows What I Need

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6 ESV

This time last year I would have never imagined at my age that I would have a newborn baby girl. Admittedly, I wasn’t too happy when I found out I was pregnant last June. My youngest was 11 at the time and my oldest would be entering her Senior year in High School. Having another child was not anywhere in my plan. My husband and I had it all planned out. Once our youngest graduated, we would pursue full time RV living and travel the United States. I could see the end of our homeschool journey. We were moving towards empty nesters. A pregnancy would throw a monkey wrench (or so we thought) into all our ideas.

Not only was I not thrilled with being pregnant, my pregnancy turned out to be complicated. Within a couple of weeks of discovering I was expecting, I developed a life threatening blood clot (DVT). The remainder of my pregnancy would require close monitoring by a team of doctors including high risk OBGYN and a hematologist. When I went to my regular OBGYN visit, they actually dismissed me from the practice because I was too “high risk” for them to handle. After hearing the doctor’s reasoning for not treating me and hearing her never ending list of things that could go wrong, I was in a state of worry, fear, distraught and denial.

Still God saw, God knew and God moved. The Lord was gracious with me and allowed me to see that He was working in the pregnancy.

My first glimmer of excitement didn’t really happen until we did our gender reveal. My husband and I opted to let family and friends know what we were having at SeaWorld. A trainer so graciously helped us by having Katina, the killer whale, pose with us for a candid shot of a the best pink SeaWorld stuffed killer whale and baby clothes. Then baby showers came and I began to acquire some baby needs. Reality began to sink in…..a little one was on her way despite complications.

On January 16, 2019, Jenna Leighanne was born. I had developed Pre-eclampsia and had to be induced three weeks early. But this little baby girl who the Lord chose to bless us with was here. And I tell you what, I couldn’t be more smitten with something. She is absolutely beautiful, precious and a treasured gift from God.

I may think I have my plans all laid out. Yet, our God, He knows better and His plans are always perfect. He knows what He is doing and He knows what our needs our. He knows what we need before we do and way more than we do.

I’m not sure why he chose us to have a baby so late in life. Still my fears, doubt and frustrations gave way to something so beautiful and perfect that only God could orchestrate. I’m thankful the Lord is Sovereign and He does as He pleases because His way is always better that what I could think or do or plan.

4 thoughts on “God Knows What I Need

  1. Luwana

    My parents, too, had a surprise little girl when I was nearly 14. She has been our joy and laughter through tough times. Now as an adult I do not know what I would do without my precious baby sister Greta. God bless your family as this arrival enriches your lives. God does know what He’s doing.

  2. LaurieLaurie Adams

    “Still God saw, God knew and God moved. ” so thankful for the promise that God will never leave us and that He had His Hand upon you and your beautiful baby girl!