A Needy Heart
My five year old came home from church this week explaining to me all about heaven. “There’s no more bad guys there and no one will be sad or scared anymore. Nobody will need a doctor anymore because we won’t get sick or hurt. I can’t wait to go there!” His enthusiasm for heaven had me contemplating my own longing for that day, when we will be perfect with God. I can’t wait – 
why can’t it be like that now?
When I came to Christ many years ago, I imagined that all of my weaknesses would be wiped out and that my imperfections would be filled in as God fixed up my broken heart. My heart is broken in all the usual ways – unmet needs, sins that linger, impure thoughts, stumbling blocks and the like. And the truth is, He has healed me from my sinful nature and He has delivered me from the power of sin, but I still struggle with daily challenges, making mistakes time and time again and feeling a deep emptiness inside.
If I could name my greatest desire, it would be this: a perfectly healed heart with pure motives, right thinking and complete fulfillment in God. I ache with the knowledge that there is something more for me, that my experience in this life is incomplete and marred because of sin. I want God to take away that ache, to make it all better – and I know He will, just not quite yet.
When I wonder about His timing in bringing complete healing, complete freedom from sin, and complete oneness with His heart, I’m reminded of an expression someone once told me. He said, “thank God for your burdens, because they cause you to lean on Him.” It’s a simple sentence and yet one that transforms my heart when I feel heavy with burdens and the fallen nature of this world. It’s at that moment when I am weakest, when I am the neediest, that I sense my need for God the most. That’s when I turn to Him, when I rely on Him and lean hard on Him because I know I could not manage without Him.
Perhaps what God really wants from me and in me is not so much a perfect heart as a needy heart. He said blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness for they shall be filled. My heart is hungry and thirsty these days, and so I thank God for that, for the hunger that causes me to turn to Him and feast on His Word and the thirst that draws me into His presence regularly.
What burdens can you thank God for today? What challenges are you facing that are causing you to rely on Him?
Praising GOD that through it all I am able to continue to put one foot in front of the other.
Hugs, andrea
PS: Great post!
That’s very true, our burdens do cause us to turn to Him. I heard something simliar recently, I think it was on an audio book I’m listening to. Thanks for sharing.
God bless,
Bethany
Amen, so true.
My burdens are teaching me to slow down and look at others through God’s eyes…we never know what type of trials others are going through, so we should always be ready to lend a helping hand, pray, and give the type support we would like to have…
My greatest challenge is stepping back and letting God have complete control in situations that I have been trying to “fix”…I know His plans are so much better than mine…but I still tend to stick my nose in where it should not be…and then wonder why things go wrong…
I am struggling with a relationship at work right now. But by His grace, He is showing me through His Word how to deal with it. Yes, I too have a needy heart; leaning on Him for answers.
Thank you Heather for sharing your wisdom with us.
This made me think of my grandson when he was about 4. When he was sad or hurting in anyway he would reach up and say “Hold you!” and I’d immediately scoop him up and hold him close until his hurt went away, then he’d be off and on his way. I always thought it was cute the way he would say hold you instead of hold me. But after reading this today I realized he was probably right. He knew I’d hold on to him, but he clung to me for dear life. It brought him great comfort. Oh that I would run to Jesus and hold on to Him.
Great post.
It’s definitely true we turn to Him more because of our burdens – but honestly I find this a little depressing. I was up late last night helping my mom with something (and wasn’t too thrilled about it) so between the exhaustion and the need for patience I probably prayed more in those few hours than I did the whole rest of the day combined.
Yes it’s important we turn to Jesus when we’re struggling, but I wonder if the day will ever come where I turn to Him equally as much when I am not. Hope so!
Heather, that is a good point. If we had a perfect heart right now, we wouldn’t feel the need for God. Our neediness draws us closer to Him as we realize we cannot live without Him.
Blessings,
Debbie