The Flip Side of Fear
Fear is an emotion that I’ve lived with all my life. From foolish little worries to massive panic attacks, I’ve experienced it all.
Years ago, as a young 20-something U.S. Customs officer, I was asked to teach a class at the Federal Law Enforcement Training Center in Georgia. To say I was terrified would be an understatement. Nevertheless, I drove from NJ to Georgia in my little blue Ford and spent 2 weeks preparing for a 4 week class in the tariff code. I get bored even mentioning the subject and wondered what my students from across the country would think. And with my massive stage fright, I was barely able to function. I had asked my friends at home to pray for me, telling them that I would begin teaching on Wednesday at 8:00 am.
On Wednesday morning, my fear was at an all-time high. My throat felt like it was closing. I was positive I wouldn’t be able to speak a word. As the students entered the classroom, I greeted them with a forced smile and wondered how I’d get through the morning. I made my way to the podium, gripped the edges, and looked down at my papers – when I felt a strange sensation. From the top of my head, a tingling feeling began to make its way down my head, spine, arms, torso, legs, and out my feet. Innately, I knew the tingle was fear leaving my body. I took a breath, glanced up, and my eyes landed on the clock – exactly 8:00 am. I heard a silent voice saying, “Perfect love casts out fear,” and remembered telling my prayer warriors that I was to begin at that moment. I looked down at the floor, certain that I’d see a puddle of fear on the floor, and I wanted to know what fear looked like. Alas, all I saw were those old 12 inch black and white tiles frequently used in schools.
Miraculously, sovereign God removed my fear before I uttered a word. And I want to say that I’ve never experienced fear since that moment. I want to say that, but I can’t because that would be a huge lie! Unfortunately, I’ve experienced fear many times since. But this I know: God CAN supernaturally remove fear. Therefore, if He doesn’t, it means that the fear is serving a purpose, His purpose.
Perhaps it is keeping me from danger or harm. Often, dare I say mostly, it serves to keep me praying and relying on God. Fear is like a tether that keeps me tied to God when I might be tempted to strive in my own limited strength.
Throughout Scripture, we are told, “Do not be afraid.” “Fear not.” And each time they mean the same thing: Trust God. Make the choice to trust God with your heart, soul, mind, and strength even if fear is nipping at your emotions. He can cast out fear in an instant, so if He’s saying to you, “Do not be afraid,” He means “Trust Me. I’m with you.” Allow your fear to draw you closer to God.
Amazingly, I now actively speak at retreats and events, and I even am the chairperson of my state organization’s Speakers Bureau! And all I can say about that is this: “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.”
There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. 1 John 4:18
What a testimony of God meeting the need just at the right time! Isn’t He good?
It makes me think of what Corey Ten Boom said her father told her about the train ticket. (She had ask him how they would endure the Nazis if caught). He told her he only gave her the train ticket when it was time for the train. We get our grace for the trial just as we need it.
Powerful testimony about how God is with us in every situation; even during speaking/teaching engagements.
I loved reading how God lifted your fear! Fear is one thing that grips most of us but I’m so thankful that His perfect love casts our fear out.