When My Baby Cries
Today our guest writer is Emily Wierenga.
He lay, curled tight, rolls of red, eyelids like pencil-lines. His chest battered hiccups and I cried. My three-day-old hurt and I couldn’t help.
Then, teeth cut upwards, jagged white fence posts, face wrinkled tight and again, I held close, for baby breathed pain. “Why does teething need to hurt?” I asked husband, as sixth broke through, and he smiled in his man-way and spoke tender; “God’s preparing our little one for bigger hurts.”
These days, sitting tired, baby falls, head on wood; gasps for air and looks around; weeps for world-come-crashing-down and I scoop up fast and kiss his world back together. Hushing quiet with lullaby.
And as twilight drips moon, husband tells me wait—let baby shove bum beneath blanket, flail fists and cry, but sometimes I can’t for sobs-too-hard; it’s like the parable-widow knocking on door… knock, knock, on mama-heart… and even if it’s just to hug and whisper my presence, son soothes and lies closed-eyes until sleep unfolds like homespun blanket.
And God lives in me in these mama-moments. Father-of-Prodigal shines, and I am one with the One who taught Ephraim to walk and who fed Israel and who wept as both turned their backs; who begged, “return!”, then promised day of no-tears, of all-abundance, when they did.
And it may seem foolish, this weeping when baby hiccups, this picking up and soothing when bed-head-begs, this no-tear-promise, but I must: this wastefulness of grace. This extravagance of a Savior. This love of a mother.
I didn’t know I could love, like this. I didn’t know it would hurt, like this. But I would do it over, in a second.
God knew He could love, like that. He knew it would hurt, as it did. And He would do it all over again—that dying on a cross, that resurrecting for sin-world—in a second.
It’s the wastefulness of grace. The extravagance of a Savior. The love of a Father.
“He will lead them to springs of living water… and God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.” (Revelation 7:17)
Emily is a freelance journalist, author and artist from Blyth, Ontario. Her first book, “Save My Children” was published in September of 2008.You can visit Emily over at her personal blog: http://www.emilywierenga.com/
Beyond lovely.
I love your description of these special mama-moments…and the comparison with God’s love…a perfect reminder as I go through my day!
Comparing the hurting heart of a mother over the tears of her child was a beautiful comparison to God’s compassion for us. Thanks for sharing.
Living for Him, Joan
What a delight to find you here Em.
You love so well. It is that extravagant grace that draws us to the Father. Miracle of love.
“God’s preparing our little one for bigger hurts.”
What a beautiful way of looking at something painful.