Love – a choice or a command?
“One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?” “The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this:
‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”” Mark 12:28-31 NIV
I’m not always lovable. I’ll be the first to admit it. There are times when I am selfish, unkind, and uncaring. Of course I’m not proud of these qualities, but I know I’m not always lovable. The people closest to me are not always lovable either! There are times when I am hurt by my husband, or disappointed by one of my sons, or feel betrayed by a friend. During those times my tendency is to withdraw, to cocoon myself in a shield to avoid further hurt. When I’m hurt I often don’t show love to those who have hurt me. I have a feeling I’m not alone.
I’ve been pondering this lately because of a rift in one of my relationships. I realized that I was not being loving, and as I prayed and meditated on scripture, God convicted me. It’s not up to me to choose when I want to be loving, and when I can withdraw that love. Love is not a choice; it’s a commandment. What if God were to withdraw His love when we did something that hurt Him? We wouldn’t survive!
This is not easy. At times I don’t feel very loving and I don’t “want” to love others. But I need to avoid being led by my emotions. I am trying to let God lead me, and even when I’m hurt, to respond in love. It’s not up to me to choose when I want to be loving. God commands us to love. Loving God and loving others are commands – the greatest commandments. We cannot neglect to love. If we choose not to love, we are not following God. God is love.
“We love because he first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.” 1 John 4:19-21 NIV
You are not alone at all, Katie. There are days I don’t to be loving on others, nor am I lovable. You are right, we need to, even if we don’t feel like it. Thank you for this reminder.
This was a difficult post to write, but even more difficult to live out!
Katie, I can so relate. I have a tendency to withdraw also. Thank you for the reminder that showing love is not a choice, it’s a command.